Nile began his comedy career at the tender age of...well whatever age you are when you're in kindergarten. Amazed and delighted by the first knockknock joke he'd ever heard (as told by his then best friend Bradley who will be played by Marc Hamel in the movie of Nile's life), Nile decided to try his hand.

Nile: Knock knock.

Bradley: Who's there?

Nile: Banana.

Bradley: Banana who?

Nile: Banana apple.

The silence was deafening. A few awkward seconds later, Bradley explained that it had to be funny (although one could argue that Nile may have been too hip for the room). It was Nile's first bad show and it would stick with him for years, driving him to forge the barest bones of a career in the entertainment industry through a mix of talent and sheer force of will, to write joke after joke, news piece after news piece until that silence from over two decades ago was finally filled.

Well. That certainly was intense wasn't it?

It did end well for Nile. He killed in grade four when he presented a reading of his comedy short story (although in grade four it counted as a book) on a witch and the tale of her horrifying death. He again murdered in grade 8 when he took second place in his class's oral presentation competition with a killer ten minutes of cerebral material heavily influenced by Steven Wright (for real. totally not kidding). The feeling of killing was blood in the water. He tried to drive it away with all sorts of bad, self abusive acts like getting a bachelor in psychology but it was too strong. He returned to the stage in the nineties and started right where he'd left off.

Since then, Nile has written for This Hour Has 22 Minutes, been the Just for Laughs Festival in Montreal twice for short films he'd written and in one instance co-directed, published a book entitled I On World 2004: The Little Year That Could...But Didn't and is currently touring his critically acclaimed one man show Fear of a Brown Planet.

Despite many critical and fringe successes, Nile has yet to achieve real commercial success possibly making him the Anna Kournikova of comedy. However, unlike his nemesis, he doesn't really have the swimsuit issue option to fall back on.

Or DOES HE.....?